Friday, January 9, 2015

Self Sufficient

I love reading "Happy Hausfrau" ( and enjoy her wit and positive view about surviving divorce.  However I was reading a post the other day that talked about how she needed help and a bunch of her friends "loaned" her their husbands to help her out.  She said that most of her friends were still married.

My life is the opposite, most of my friends (at least the ones who live in my area) AREN'T still married.  I'm having a gathering of friends a week from tomorrow and out of the five of us...only one is still married.  Two of them had their husbands leave them for other sluts women and two of us just have bad taste in men.

There is only one possible "loaner" husband for me.  I did ask him to help me set up my washer and dryer when we moved.  Especially as my dryer had a four pronged plug and my duplex had a three pronged outlet.  He was incredibly nice and changed the plug for me once I bought a new one.  I don't want to over use him so I'm trying to be as self reliant as I can.

One reason I decided to get a rental is because when my gutters are full of leaves, the dishwasher overflows or the roof is isn't my job to fix it, the property management has to take care of it.  I thought this through and decided this would be the best option because I am not good at fixing things and even the few things I know how to fix, I'm usually not strong enough to fix thanks to my fibromyalgia.

Some of this is a learning experience for my kids and me.  We all know how to plunge a toilet.  Just last week my fridge and microwave both blew a circuit and I got to show my daughters how to check the breaker box and reset the breaker.  Question for electricians...Kitchens always have a dedicated spot for stuff like refrigerators and dishwashers, so it is seldom ever a surprise where they'll be plugged in.  Knowing this...why don't you give them their own circuits?  I say this knowing the Ex was a contracter who also worked as an electrician and he'd create single circuits for all of the big item things that would likely trip the circuit.

Learning to do all of this myself is a good lesson, for both the kids and myself.  My daughters will be self sufficient and will know how to do these things for themselves without having to rely on a boyfriend or husband to do them.  My son will also learn how to do the stuff that so many millennials aren't learning.  So while it is hard and sometimes frustrating, there is almost always a youtube video to show me how and I know I (we) can do it.

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